I'm Not There
by Cosmic Castaway
Summary: Sequel to 'Dust in the Wind'
1. Part A

_Author Note: Well I didn't expect for my muse to jump in there and grab me. But after writing Dust in the Wind, I wanted to do the sequel to it. So here is Part A. I'm going to write Part B ;), Originally this story has Shine Your Light Lyrics, by Robbie Robertson, but since FF.N doesn't allow it anymore, you don't get to see it the way it 'should' be…hope some of you still enjoy it ;)…_

**I'm Not There – Part A**

I didn't know I was going to die. Funny thing was, I really did believe I could save our jet. I wanted to come out victorious, escaping death like I had done most of my life. But it wasn't meant to be this time, my luck had finally run out and I had used up all my lives.

I remember the first few minutes prior to hitting that tower, before it ended my life. Some new villain was yet again attacking our city, trying to take away from what we had built and worked so hard to achieve. We came to her aid, Megakat City, like we always did. Rescuing standby's who were stricken with fear, and of course the lovely Miss Briggs. For as much as that shekat got into trouble, it was always great getting her out of it.

Then the battle had begun, and it was us against him. We fought hard, throwing everything we had at him, my best friend, no….my brother did a great job. He always did, there wasn't anyone he couldn't bring down it seemed, and there was no one that I couldn't out fly and out maneuver. Until that day.

Don't get me wrong, I still kicked his tail, or whatever he had I'm not sure. Never did get a good glimpse of him. I'm really not sure how it happened, one minute I was dodging his shots and next we were going into a deadly spin. I could hear Razor shouting stuff to me, as I looked down at the counsel and saw everything lighting up with warnings. It seemed everything was shutting down on me all because of one single shot.

"Son of a.." I could feel the G-Forces pulling at me, and I fought with the stick. I moved it back and forth, trying for some kind of response, but it was like driving a washer machine, she was just not responding. Then the thought I might not be able to pull us out of this, without even thinking about my actions, I got enough control to level the plane out and opened the canopy and hit the ejector button.

I think you were screaming, but I passed it off as just the high winds that were hitting the jet at such a high speed. Then shutting the canopy, I looked back at the tail to see black smoke coming from the exhaust. 'This is definitely not good.' As I dodged another shot with the plane shutting down on me, I feel another blow that makes the entire plane shutter. She was screaming in pain as though the Tuborkat was a living-breathing thing that could respond to that sort of thing.

The last hit caused the plane to take another spin and this time it was useless. There was nothing I can do and as I look up from the control panel I see the tower looming ahead, coming up fast and I know that's it. I don't have enough time to even eject, and the last thing I can think is 'What about Jake?'

* * *

I'm not sure how I ended up at the Garage. I thought for sure I would be reunited with relatives, my family members that passed on. 'Funny, I thought heaven be lot cleaner.' Instead here I was standing in the living room looking down at Jake who was still in his uniform, not caring anymore if anybody saw him or not.

I looked over and Ann Gora was giving the news about my death on the TV. 'Never expected this, watch my own death.' Couldn't help but wince when I watched it from their point of view as I slammed into the tower. Black smoke filled the sky as remains of the tower and jet fell down onto the citizens below. 'I hope I didn't hurt anyone.'

Sitting down beside Jake I move my paw up and down in front of his face, but he doesn't even see it. Sighing, I lean back into the chair as though nothing happened and Jake and I are just watching another day's work. Watching as Feral criticized our ways of handling the situation and laughing at his pathetic attempt to try and arrest us.

I can't stand this. I feel like I'm being ignored, and there nothing I can do to fix it. All I want to do is say how sorry I am. That I never meant to do this, that I wanted more then anything to be alive right now. But I can't.

Glancing back at the TV as once again they replay the scene just in case somebody had missed it the first million times they showed it. I really begin to wonder who else really would care besides Jake and a few others. Then I saw the remote fly before I processed the growl emitting from Jake, as the TV exploded. Sparks flew but soon quieted down causing the entire room to go pitch black.

"Bingo." I hear Jake mumble under his breath.

I can't even bare to bring my face up and look at you. I know it's my fault. I did this to you. He's in agony over this, and I can't even tell him everything will be okay. All I can do is sit there, and just listen to him cry.

**TBC….**


	2. Part B

**Author Note: Thank you guys for being so supportive in me writing this and I owe it to you ;) you guys are awesome so here you go, and enjoy! Once again I was suppose to have lyrics in this, but becaues of FF.N (rolls eyes) I can't and it fits with this perfectly. Check out Lizzie West's song Prayer, talks about not being dead...great GREAT song ;)...anyways enjoy!**

* * *

**Part B**

Rain. For once I can stand out in it and not get soaked. I can no longer even feel the drops on my fur as I stand and watch my own memorial service. I never thought I would be standing and watching my own funeral. I can't say anything, feel anything, I'm no longer Chance Furlong. All I am now is….I don't even know what I am anymore.

Was this my plan? My destiny to forever walk this planet as a lost soul that can't figure out where I'm suppose to be. Watching as the ones I love grow old and gray, and cherishing life for what it is and I just get to stay here being immortal.

I can't stand this! I can no longer comfort or tell my best friend it will be all right. That he'll work through this, that some how no matter how it looks right now it will get better in the end. No, all I can do now is stand in the back of this crowd and watch them lower my own coffin into the cold and wet ground.

I know Jake is there, even though I can't see him, and the only thing I want to do is hug him and tell him….something, anything! It be better then just standing here because the one thing I want to do so badly is the one thing I will never be allowed to do ever again.

Slowly I notice people beginning to walk away and I realize the service is over, and I'm beginning to see who really was there. I could not believe who I saw standing next to Jake, but none other then Feral himself.

No, there was no way I was seeing this it had to be some kind of false illusion that I was making up. It had to be a dead thing, that's what it was. But there he was, standing right there with his niece and Callie.

I can see his mouth saying something and he then pats Jake on the shoulder and then walks away. I watch as Felina stands there for a few seconds she turns and begins walking away but gives one more glance at Callie and Jake standing there. I didn't think it was possible, but I saw tears running down Felina's face. She always put this facade on, as though nothing could bother her, but tears were very evident on her face as she hurried and put her sunglasses on. Nobody would see this as she walked down the hill, away from my gravesite.

I still have not moved from my spot since I arrived there. Heck, I still can't figure out how I got there in the first place. One minute I was in the Garage debating if I should even go, and then I was there. I wasn't yet use to it and it was something I was going to have to work on. Heaven forbid if I ended up somewhere I didn't intended and see something I could live without seeing.

Coming out of my thinking I turned and looked as Callie turns and looks at Jake, she trying to say something but can't quite get the words across. Even from were I stand, I can see that old tears were constantly being replaced by new ones. Turning she to leaves to and I watch her climb into the limo and that's it nobody else but Jake and I. I know I'm kidding myself now, because it's not Jake and Chance anymore, its just Jake. I am no longer in the picture.

'I'm here, you might not know it, but I'm here Jake your not alone as you think you are.' I slowly began to walk towards him. But I stop when I hear Jake begin to speak.

"How could you do this?" I see from the back Jake's shaking his head and he continues talking. "How could you do this to me?"

For once in my life, I'm afraid to move. I'm frozen and all I can do is watch as Jake's back shudders as his soul is weeping and crying out for some kind of comfort or closure to this never ending road.

"You were my brother, so are you happy….you got to go out in a blaze of glory and left me here to try and pick up the pieces!"

I heard it in Jake's voice loud and clear, as his voice shook with anguish it also had anger. Then without any fair warning Jake had begun striking at the headstone, kicking shoving and then with one final yell he pushed it over.

"I HATE YOU," Jake's voice was scratchy as his own paws were curled up into very tight fists, "DO YOU HEAR ME," Jake's voice then dropped low as he repeated his words as his entire body shook with such force. Tears were uncontrollably falling as he then suddenly sank to the ground and continued to sob right there. His heart was bleeding and all I could do now was stand there and watch this scene unfold in front of me.

I couldn't stand it any longer and taking a few strides I was directly behind Jake and then not sure what was going to happen I put my own paw on Jake's shoulder. What I really had expected was Jake to continue to cry but he stopped so suddenly that I brought my own paw back in fright. No way I could have predicted such a reaction and it for a second I thought I had hurt him.

Slowly but surely Jake turned around. I backed up seeing how Jake was looking right through me but there was something in his eyes. I didn't even know how to begin to read it and as I stopped walking backwards, under his breath Jake whispered my name.

This was not possible, or was it? Did he actual sense me, did he know I was there for him that I hadn't left. There just could be no way and I wasn't sure what I do if he actually could see me.

I wasn't sure how long I stayed there, as Jake looked right through me as his eyes moved back and forth quickly trying to register something that wasn't there. A part of me was wishing he would see me that I would be able to talk to my friend. But I knew it wasn't meant to be for he then let out a heavy sigh and got up from the ground. He almost walked right through me had I not stepped out of the way. I just couldn't imagine what that must feel like and I didn't have much intention on finding out either. As I stared at my own grave were the funeral casket sat, I glanced back at Jake. He once again halted and turned and with tears still running down his face, he simply whispered, "goodbye my friend."

My eyes travel downward as I no longer can look at Jake as he then walks away leaving me to stand there in the graveyard by myself. Off in the distance I hear one lone bird cry out. This can't be happening. I can't be dead. This has to be some horrible nightmare that I have yet to awaken from and Jake and I'll continue doing what we do best, and that's putting on our uniforms and being the infamous Swat Kats.

As I glance back at my gravesite and see the tombstone reading my name I know it isn't some dream I conjured up in my head. This is for real and there is no turning back; I can't undo what has happened to me. I can't make things right.

But as I begin walking down the tiny incline, I realize I can still be there for Jake. Even though physically I'm no longer there, that doesn't mean I can't stop supporting him. No, I promised I'd be there until the end, and my friend this is far from being over.

The End

To My Reviewers 

**Quick Shot, Parasite, and Sammy- **_Thank you 3, you guys were so nice with your words and I can't help but thank you so much ;! _


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